Managing Your Emotions When You’re Angry
Anger is a natural reaction, but letting it take over your life is unhealthy. Learn how to recognize your triggers, calm yourself down and positively deal with your anger.
People with problems controlling their anger may need to see a psychologist or other mental health professional. This can help them identify the underlying causes of their anger and work to change those beliefs.
Be Assertive
Assertiveness is an important communication skill that can help you handle conflicts with others reasonably. It can also improve your workplace relationships and boost your career success.
Being assertive can be a skill that takes practice to develop, but it can be an essential tool for your mental health and overall well-being. In fact, it can reduce stress and anxiety by helping you face your fears head-on.
The first step to being assertive is to have clarity about your needs and wants. This might take some time, but it’s worth the effort to be clear about what you need and want before attempting to communicate with someone else.
Another tip is to keep your communication short and simple. This will help you avoid triggering defensiveness, says Jeff Helfand.
You can also use “I statements” to keep the focus on you and your needs instead of pointing fingers at other people’s behavior. These are especially helpful if you find it difficult to express your feelings without triggering a reaction from the person you are talking with. A better understanding of the causes of anger expression, its current and historical causes, your reactions to it, and its effects on you and your relationships can all be gained through anger management therapy techniques.
Take a Time-Out
Taking a time-out is a skill you can use when you feel your anger rising. It helps you calm down to re-enter a productive conversation and/or task.
You can take a time-out in many ways, like going outside or to another room. But it is essential to find the right time and place for your relaxation.
The time-out must be short and consistent. It should be a safe and boring place that does not have toys, games or other reinforcers.
Children who still need to be ready to learn this technique may need several time-outs to understand the concept. This is normal in the early days of using vacations.
Once your child understands the concept, you can start implementing it regularly. However, remember that it is not a substitute for yelling or spanking.
Exercise
Increasing your heart rate through exercise can help release tension, reduce anger and improve mood. It can also boost your immune system, keep your weight under control and increase longevity.
Exercising can also lower stress, a significant factor leading to angry feelings and outbursts. It also reduces blood pressure and releases endorphins in the bloodstream, boosting mood.
However, exercising when enraged isn’t always a good idea. In fact, you might be increasing your risk of heart complications if you exert yourself too much while you’re feeling frustrated.
That’s why it’s important to exercise while you’re calm. And that’s especially true for exercises that put your heart and lungs to the test.
You can start with a few minutes of easy activity on your body and work up to an hour or more. If you need help deciding what exercises to try, check with your doctor to make an appointment for a physical evaluation.
Focus on the Positive
If you’re prone to negative thoughts and feelings, you can train your brain to be more optimistic by concentrating on the good things in life. This can be hard to do when facing difficult situations, but it will pay off in the long run.
Your mindset can significantly affect your approach to your problems and attitude toward people. For example, if you’re always looking at the negative aspects of someone or something, you might be more likely to act out.
Instead, focus on the positive aspects of your interactions and relationships. For example, if your partner is late for dinner or their messy room makes you feel bad, talk about the positive aspects of your relationship rather than getting irrationally angry.
Negative thoughts and feelings shape your brain, affecting your emotions and how you see your world. When you think positively, you expect favorable results and situations which will help you get through even the most difficult circumstances.
Take a Deep Breath
Taking a deep breath is one of the most effective and efficient ways to reduce stress. In addition to reducing stress and calming your body, deep breathing helps with digestion and lowers blood pressure.
When you’re angry, your body tends to react with the fight-or-flight response (which is your sympathetic nervous system). That means your heart rate increases, breathing faster, and producing adrenaline.
If you can slow down your breathing and switch to deeper breathing from the diaphragm instead of your chest, it will help your anger subside.
Deep breathing is a meditation technique used for centuries to quiet the mind and reduce stress. It’s also an essential part of yoga and other contemplative practices.
Practicing deep breathing can be challenging, but it can help your body and mind get to a more balanced state of being. If you’re struggling with deep breathing, try different breathing patterns, be mindful of your feelings, or find peer support if needed.